The Pillars of Manliness.

They don’t hand you a list like this when you graduate high school. You have to learn it from a role model like your father or older brother or someone like that. Only problem is not all kids have fathers or brothers to look up to. They wind up looking up to the wrong people and get a warped sense of values. Some role models just aren’t manly either.

Statue of a boy peeing into the valley to prov...

Statue of a boy peeing into the valley to prove his manliness (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This is good to read if you’re a young guy that is up and coming. But hey guess what ? If you’re a girl then you should read this too! That’s because if you can find yourself a guy one day that exhibits even a portion of these characteristics then you got yourself a catch!

If you’re a father this can be good to show your son. Or read it for yourself. We are always growing and reaching higher, let this help you out!

Manly is an adjective used to describe the physical and psychological characteristics of individuals traditionally associated with men such as courage and strength. Manliness differs from masculinity in that the latter refers to a simple biological predestination while the former is often used to describe the more sublime ideals of qualities traditionally specific to men. All males are masculine as they are sexually male. Yet manliness looks down upon males not exhibiting full native characteristics. Standards of strictly masculine and higher manly behavior have changed over time and vary a great deal depending on cultural values, upbringing and personal beliefs.

Understand what makes a male manly

There are seven pillars of manliness. To be truly manly, try to progress in as many as possible

  1. 1

    Physical.

    • Manly men are physically more powerful and impressive than women or unmanly males.
    • Developed muscles and an overall higher level of fitness set the manly apart.
    • Athleticism is a key component of the physical pillar of masculinity, as it contributes to enjoyment of competition and overall physical prowess.
    • The manly male does not obsess over losing physical looks, and is not obsessed with physical appearance or the natural process of aging.
  2. 2

    Functional

    • To be a mature man, one must be committed to his family by contributing to it however he may.
    • As the head of the family, with a partner and offspring depending on you is to be a manly father.
  3. 3

    Sexual

    • It is typically seen as manly to be sexually assertive, bold, and experienced.
    • Married or single
  4. 4

    Emotional

    • Tolerant and in control are characteristics of the manly man.
    • To be overly emotional is to lack control of one’s self and environment.
    • An assured leader that others look up to and in control of his emotions.
    • It is manly to be calm, provide emotional support for those in need, and not be weepy. Knowing when to empathize shows a true man.
  5. 5

    Intellectual

    • Manliness is logical, intellectual, rational, objective and practical, not overtly emotional
  6. 6

    Interpersonal

    • A man seeks leadership roles such as guiding, disciplinarian, independent, free, individualistic, demanding.
    • Manliness is self-satisfied in that it does not seek nor need the approval of others.
    • The manly need respect as the womanly need love.
  7. 7

    Distinctive

    • Setting manliness apart from the feminine or unmanly males proves that person’s insecurity.
    • Manliness is wild and seeks the wild.
    • The manly consider risking loss to stand for important beliefs or principles.
    • As a mother’s touch is civilizing, a manly instinct is rough and indelicate

Become the manly male

  1. 1

    Physical

    • Lift weights, play sports, get coaching and lessons.
    • Stand up straight with a poised, erect stature.
    • Get a personal trainer.
    • Watch boxers or MMA fighters for inspiration.
  2. 2

    Functional

    • If a husband or father, develop and exhibit your leadership qualities.
    • If a boyfriend, develop your masculine maturity and find appropriate opportunities to learn to be a manly gentleman in that role.
    • Find a mentor from whom you can learn.
    • Emulate manly role models, familiar friends or famous heroes.
  3. 3

    Sexual

    • If single, work to become sexually confident and dominant.
    • Get a dating-help program or ask that “player” buddy who has all the luck with to help you out
    • Get out and meet more dates. Don’t be shy and pathetic and only hang out with friends.
    • If married, please your partner.
  4. 4

    Emotional

    • Honestly critique your emotional state and tackle your weaknesses in every situation in which you fall short.
  5. 5

    Intellectual

    • Develop your logical skills.
    • Join a debate team.
    • Take math classes.
    • Approach decisions and problems objectively.
  6. 6

    Interpersonal

    • Seek leadership roles in organizations.
    • Join sports teams.
    • Project confidence and do not seek the approval of others.
    • Save your tenderness for your relationships with women, but be a Rock of Gibraltar on whom the more emotional can lean on when necessary.
  7. 7

    Distinctive

    • Buy a gun.
    • Go hunting.
    • Be assertive in meetings at work.
    • Seek competition and revel in your new-found competitiveness

Live manliness

  1. 1

    Physical

    • Enjoy your new strength and athleticism.
    • Enjoy your athleticism, but do not put it on display.
    • Take good care of your body—diet and exercise.
  2. 2

    Functional

    • Be a leader in the family and outside.
    • Assume authority and seek responsibility to lead others.
  3. 3

    Sexual

    • Pursue partners, don’t just timidly express interest or desire abashedly from the shadows.
    • Do not be afraid to explore all aspects of your sexuality.
  4. 4

    Emotional

    • Feel the strength that comes from others who look up to you.
    • Be there for those who need emotional succor or for males needing a role model.
  5. 5

    Intellectual

    • Tackle problems with dispassionate ease as you think manly.
  6. 6

    Interpersonal

    • Be self-possessed and assured in your interpersonal relationships, now invigorated by manliness.
  7. Distinctive
    • Enjoy uninhibited competition.
    • Roam the wild, shoot buffalo.
    • Stand for your dearest-held beliefs.
    • In short, make civilization better.

     Tips

  • Be moral, loyal, honest, humble, charitable, strong, supportive, helpful, and caring.
  • Don’t let anyone walk over you; read “The Manipulated Man” and “The Myth of Man Power”.
  • The scout morals are good to follow: trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean and reverent. Be prepared. To help others at all times. To keep myself physically strong mentally awake and morally straight.”
  • Speak up for yourself and your fellow men.
  • Emulate manly role models and heroes, famous or familiar friends.
  • Identifying as male is the first step: If you feel more comfortable as a girl, don’t feel like you need to be a man!

  • Be a man, and don’t become a Neanderthal: remind yourself constantly that a man is sophisticated and thinks of others.
  • Don’t use steroids.
  • Some cultures and value systems recognize behaviors as manly that many others would consider unacceptable or even illegal. When engaging in manly behavior, always ask yourself if you personally find your actions acceptable. It is OK to be less manly if it makes you a better human being.

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One thought on “The Pillars of Manliness.

  1. Pingback: Why fathers are important role models for boys | psychologymum

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